i am still sick and i can hardly stand it anymore. i don't know what the fuck is up with my immune system. last time i got sick it lasted over a month until i finally broke down and went to the doctor. this time it will be three weeks tomorrow, and i just don't have TIME to go to the fucking doctor. UGH! so that is why i am at home doing a fucking diary entry on a friday nite instead of livin it up like everyone else. sorry. i am frustrated.

if you have been to the sugar shack before and have met lemmy, you know what a fucking nutball he is. besides getting into everything imaginable around here, look what he has done now!!!. beth and i don't know what to do with him. and it makes us nervous not knowing where that knife collection is, especially when i sleep.

school is uneventful. this morning there was a party outside 438 and feowyn met beth and i there to give us the awesome "vote for pedro" shirts she made! she rules to the max. speaking of csu, beth and i start our classes for our radio show next thursday. yay! hopefully that means we will have a show in the very near future. details coming.

improv was amazing last week. one of my favorites for sure. cody dove pretended to be lisa loeb, and he broke the sit-n-spin. beth was the inspiration for that skit. how exciting! yesterday i went to the movies with pete (?!). it was a little weird at first, because we haven't hung out since december. we went to see napoleon dynamite (finally made it to #10, where is my fucking plaque?) and some of his friends met us up there and they laughed really hard which made it awesome. pete didn't realize until after he already went home that we should have hung out longer and he almost became the neighborhood pervert but i talked him out of it. heh. little matt actually called me tonite to hang out but i was feeling too shitty and i had to pass. dang. hopefully tomorrow that will happen.

the other day something totally weird happened. i had very mixed emotions but in the end i think i feel more relieved than anything. OH MAN i want to talk about it in here but i can't bring myself to do it. i guess it's the best thing that could have happened at this point, but deep down i know it's still not enough. i want so much more. i expected so much more.

xoxo